Luigi's Dumb House
by Stupidfic
Summary: I can't believe this game has it's own category


-1Luigi walked through the creepy dark forest that was dark and creepy. Although the plumber would go pee pee in his pants and run away from a place like this, he was moving on for something very special; his own mansion! Apparently he won a mansion in some contest that he had not recall entering. Oh well, a free mansion is still a free mansion.

He checked his map and saw he was close to his prize. Luigi looked in front of him and gasped when he saw the mansion. It was a piece of crap! A very scary-looking piece of crap to say the least! Heaving a sigh, Luigi entered the scary mansion. AND THEN A GHOST APPEARED!!!!

"Whooooooo are yoooooooou?" moaned the spirit, "get the fuck oooooooout ooooooof my hooooome!"

The cowardly Italian whimpered "but I won this mansion!"

"Really?" the ghost said in surprise "oh, well, I did not know that. Sorry about scaring you and- ARRRRRRGHHHHH!!!!!!!!"

The poltergeist was then getting sucked into a vacuum. Carrying the vacuum was an old man wearing a lab coat. The old man grunted as he tried to get the ghost into his cleaning device.

"Almost got you, ya little shit!" said the man.

The spirit bitch-slapped the scientist and disappeared. Luigi went to the old fart's side. Just then, more ghosts appeared armed with crowbars and rusty hammers. The old man and Luigi screamed and ran out of the mansion.

The two went to the old man's laboratory, which was right outside the mansion and looked like an outhouse. The scientist introduced himself as E. Gadd, and Luigi introduced himself as… Luigi.

"So Luigi, what brings you to a place like this?" asked E. Gadd.

Luigi answered "oh nothing really, just won that mansion that's haunted and filled with angry spirits."

"You won the mansion? But that's impossible!"

"Why?" 

"It's a long story. You see, back when I was young I hunted ghosts for a hobby. I turned my captured spirits into paintings and store them in my personal gallery. However, they didn't like me bottling their souls and use them as art. That, and they accuse me of being an ectophile which isn't true, although I do like masturbating to the ghost portraits. Anyways, last week they escaped and ended up making the mansion you supposedly said you won. I would try to get them back, but I'm so old they can easily rape me with their eyebrows! However you may be able to capture them yourself and claim your mansion!"

E. Gadd gave the plumber the vacuum he was using earlier.

"This is the Poltergust 1234567890. With this baby, catching ghosts will be a chinch!"

Luigi looked at the strange tool and spoke "don't you have anything that isn't so crappy looking?"

The old scientist said "well I do have a ghost-snatching vibrating dildo…"

"Uh, on second thought the vacuum is fine thanks."

The Italian left the perverted professor and entered the haunted mansion. This was where the plumber's ghost hunting quest began. But now I'm starting to lack the will to write this fanfic, so I'll type that Luigi steps on a trap door and falls straight to the room where King Boo is in.

"Welcome Luigi" King Boo cackled. "I've been expecting you."

"So you're the one whose behind it all!" shouted Luigi.

"Yes I am. If you must know, I released all the ghosts from that old dude's gallery and made this mansion as a trap for you and your brother! In fact, I already imprisoned your dear sibling!"

The king of Boos move aside to show his foe a portrait containing Mario!

"HELP MEEEEEE" Mario screamed inside the painting.

Luigi gasped and said "oh my god, you got Mario!"

King Boo laughed and replied "it wasn't easy, but it's true! Now that you are all that's left, I can finally exact revenge against the Mario Brothers even though I have no idea what they did to me since I'm pretty sure I wasn't in any of the past games. Oh well, BUAHAHAHAHA!!!! Hey, where's Luigi?"

The Boo looked around to find the plumber gone. A ghost floated in holding a gift box.

"Mr. King Boo, this is for you" said the random spirit. "Luigi gave it to me when he ran out of the mansion."

Curious to see what was inside, King Boo opened the present to see what was inside. Everyone screamed when they found it was an atomic bomb! The bomb exploded and destroyed the entire mansion, along with everything inside it.

Meanwhile, Luigi was running away with an evil smirk on his face. "All my enemies are dead! Now I'm the most coolest character in the Mario series!" He then fell off a cliff and died.

END


End file.
